I remember one of my classmates was asked what he wanted to be in the future and he responded, “I want to be a dad when I grow up.” We were all surprised and when he was asked why, he said, “Because Dad gets the biggest meat.”
The teachers had a good laugh but come to think of it, that was what most people saw/knew of their dads back in the day; we saw our mothers honor them in their own little way and compel us to do the same but we never really understood why.
We were even jealous of them at some point, like who is this big person who walks in and gets all the attention of mama, eats whatever they liked, gets served on a special plate with big meat, determines what TV station we would watch? …
It took a lot of growing up to realize that not all heroes wear capes or get the glitz and spotlight they truly deserve, Dads are the unsung heroes of our time. The invisible force that keeps the world revolving, casually sacrificing their entire lives like it’s nothing.
In honor of Fathers, a couple of Nigerians shared some of their favorite memories about their dads and I just wanted to share these stories with you:
Nonso
I never really got along with my old man. He was such a disciplinarian and was hardly around. When he came home, he would review our report cards from school and since I wasn’t such a bright student back then, I dey always collect. My dad would always complain about my unseriousness and I felt he was always picking on me. It was a real struggle before my dad could get me to finish my MBA. He would always advise me about life though I never listened.
I never really understood all my dad did for me until he was long gone and I started my own family. Sis, I cried like a baby because I realized how much he sacrificed to make me who I am, how invaluable his insights and presence were, how much I needed his guidance and direction to navigate fatherhood with as much grace and calm as he did.
Fathers are real superstars mehn, nobody talks about it enough! I wish he was alive so I could give him his flowers and compensate him for all the years I gave him pain. I always advise my friends to cherish their pops while they’re alive cos you won’t have them forever but those memories will live with you for a long time.
Funbi
Baba Funbi (as I like to call him) was and still is my biggest cheerleader. I’m not his first child o but it was my way of personalizing my dad. He was always there to support and cheer me on, no matter the occassion; inter house sports, debates, matric, convocation, etc.
He never talked down at me. He didn’t have a lot of money but the one thing he had in abundance was his faith in me. He probably beat me only once when I stole meat from the pot and got caught; after the reprimands and long sermons about contentment and honesty and loads of prayers, he still bought me biscuits.
Nothing was too much for him to sacrifice for his kids. His unflinching support, lifestyle of integrity and contentment, with his world class advice have made me the successful person I am today. I respect that man so much! You can’t diss me or talk shabbily about my craft where my dad is, he’ll come for you like you stole his last card.
He is one in a million! If reincarnation is real and I get a chance to choose who my pops will be in my next life, I’ll definitely choose him. Even my mom sometimes gets jealous of how much I love and care about Baba Funbi.
Ginika
Growing up in my family, the parenting dynamic was quite different from what you’d see in the average Nigerian family. My dad was the softhearted one, while my mum was the disciplinarian. So, naturally we all defaulted to my dad for emotional support and succor. Like he says, “A dad is his baby girl’s best friend!”
My mum told me that my dad and I have been inseparable from day one. My dad has always been there for me. Unlike most ladies, my dad bought me my first sanitary pad, my first bra, and gave me my first lecture on sex education. When I had my first boyfriend, you already know the first person I told, my dad! Even my first breakfast….
Forget, that man is everything! I always tell people that when I get married and have children, my Dad is so coming for omugwo. Nobody can change my mind.
Nabila
My dad was a military general and as anyone would expect he is quite the disciplinarian. Well, he was, until I came into the picture. My mom told me she was done having kids (although my dad wanted one more) until she found out she was pregnant again.
My dad was ecstatic with joy when he found out they were having a girl and the moment I was born, it was as if someone had flipped the switch. My dad became hands on, from changing diapers to doing school runs to giving sound life advice and everything in between. He taught me how to be a supergirl; fix broken things, change my tyres (so no boy can do shakara for me like he always says..lol), self defense (you never know when it’ll come handy).
When my mum complained I was becoming a tomboy and insisted on sending me off to a finishing school, my dad would personally drop me off in the mornings and pick me up later in the day….I could go on and on about my dad and how he’s shaped my perspective on what a real man should be like. One thing I know is I can’t settle for less whenever I decide to get married because dad set the standards really high and I love him for it!
Wale
My dad is a natural born comedian. His unique sense of humor and witty comebacks would keep you howling with laughter till your insides hurt. I’m almost certain that if he was born in our generation, he would have made a great stand up comedian. The life of the party – everyone looked forward to his arrival at family gatherings.
His words and presence had a way of making things seem easier and better. Never complained about anything even when we wronged him, he had this unique way of passing his message across without making us feel bad but you can be sure he’ll drive home his point.
When his business went bad and relatives were advising him to withdraw us from school, he refused. He’d say, as long as I’m able-bodied and alive, my kids would get a proper education and never suffer and he did just that. He’ll trek for miles looking for a job, when he couldn’t get any, he settled for menial jobs to ensure there was food on the table and we had all we needed.
In all this, he’ll still come back home full of smiles and buy something for us from biscuits to puff puff and the likes. I saw the old man grind from scratch to top again without sacrificing our family or his values and in retrospect that must have been hard. Today he’s a business mogul and I’m super proud of him.
Having read these stories, you’ll agree with me that fathers go hard when it comes to sacrificing for their families. Their backs are the ladders their children climb on to become and they don’t get enough accolades.
Share some of your favourite stories or memories of your dad in our “Parenting” community on Fusion and let’s celebrate your dad together.
To all the fathers who keep making the world a better place on the strength of their love and sacrifice, we appreciate you!
